










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 68 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 167 matches | ||
| Faceit | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7120 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,805 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8975 | 33% |
| Smokes | 5513 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 5618 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 6699 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $743,350 of utility $57 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 430 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Staircase | 69% | 51 |
| #2 | lawz | 61% | 153 |
| #3 | mistermyter | 57% | 65 |
| #4 | Alexander Alexanderov | 55% | 53 |
| #5 | Antonio Juanson | 54% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Antonio Juanson | 54% | 69 |
| #6 | Covie | 53% | 109 |
| #7 | JBaby | 52% | 79 |
| #8 | Tech Sarnt’ Raids | 51% | 78 |
| #9 | n1kster | 50% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JBaby | 20 | 0.0120 |
| #2 | lawz | 15 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | Staircase | 13 | 0.0134 |
| #4 | Tech Sarnt’ Raids | 11 | 0.0067 |
| #5 | n1kster | 8 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lawz | 655 | 0.21 | 18 min |
| #2 | n1kster | 310 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #3 | Antonio Juanson | 297 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #4 | Tech Sarnt’ Raids | 290 | 0.18 | 9 min |
| #5 | Covie | 200 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Staircase | +4.53 | 81 | 67 |
| #2 | JBaby | +3.39 | 81 | 68 |
| #3 | Mystery129 | +2.21 | 85 | 71 |
| #4 | Tech Sarnt’ Raids | +0.58 | 58 | 73 |
| #5 | Covie | +0.36 | 79 | 64 |





