








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1467 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 384 matches | ||
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 86 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5924 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,569 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3402 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3810 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4217 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3140 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,419,102 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 266 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๋ | 57% | 44 |
| #2 | pik | 48% | 132 |
| #3 | _Afr0 | 48% | 31 |
| #4 | Shocky* | 45% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๋ | 57% | 44 |
| #2 | pik | 48% | 132 |
| #3 | _Afr0 | 48% | 31 |
| #4 | Shocky* | 45% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pik | 12 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | ๋ | 4 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pik | 426 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #2 | ๋ | 197 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #3 | Shocky* | 139 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #4 | _Afr0 | 57 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ๋ | +2.60 | 86 | 69 |
| #2 | Rock | +0.82 | 67 | 57 |
| #3 | Shocky* | +0.18 | 56 | 85 |
| #4 | pik | -1.05 | 56 | 80 |
| #5 | _Afr0 | -1.64 | 69 | 69 |





