








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 421 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 177 matches | ||
| Wingman | 140 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 24 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3665 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,525 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5360 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1319 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 3979 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3867 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $598,457 of utility $57 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 471 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | YvngPrinse | 55% | 53 |
| #4 | ant.Cherries | 52% | 86 |
| #5 | devanbooker | 46% | 56 |
| #6 | Quacks | 43% | 184 |
| #7 | Xynche | 36% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quacks | 46 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | devanbooker | 7 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | YvngPrinse | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | ant.Cherries | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Xynche | 3 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Quacks | 437 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #2 | devanbooker | 296 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #3 | ant.Cherries | 139 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Xynche | 125 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #5 | YvngPrinse | 83 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | culcha_candela | +1.67 | 75 | 44 |
| #2 | ant.Cherries | +1.27 | 68 | 55 |
| #3 | YvngPrinse | +0.33 | 71 | 57 |
| #4 | devanbooker | +0.04 | 33 | 79 |
| #5 | Quacks | -0.17 | 39 | 54 |





