








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 363 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
969 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,676 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1660 | 45% |
| Smokes | 765 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 578 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 673 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $360,929 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 27 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akinhaizzz | 36% | 72 |
| #2 | gurt | 27% | 11 |
| #3 | But | 22% | 9 |
| #4 | /\bov<3/\verag<3Minh | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akinhaizzz | 36% | 72 |
| #2 | gurt | 27% | 11 |
| #3 | But | 22% | 9 |
| #4 | /\bov<3/\verag<3Minh | 17% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akinhaizzz | 10 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | gurt | 1 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akinhaizzz | 200 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #2 | But | 25 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| #3 | /\bov<3/\verag<3Minh | 19 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| #4 | gurt | 17 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akinhaizzz | +1.12 | 75 | 37 |
| #2 | bevungcute | -1.46 | 57 | 53 |
| #3 | /\bov<3/\verag<3Minh | -1.85 | 28 | 53 |
| #4 | But | -2.11 | 37 | 49 |
| #5 | gurt | -2.55 | 5 | 13 |





