








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 318 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2110 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,210 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1166 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2324 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 1332 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2388 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,408,244 of utility $323 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 710 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smoll_fly | 54% | 191 |
| #2 | misteryjunior | 52% | 264 |
| #3 | Kujo | 51% | 302 |
| #4 | Canermarf | 49% | 251 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smoll_fly | 54% | 191 |
| #2 | misteryjunior | 52% | 264 |
| #3 | Kujo | 51% | 302 |
| #4 | Canermarf | 49% | 251 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kujo | 20 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | misteryjunior | 12 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | smoll_fly | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Canermarf | 4 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kujo | 562 | 0.09 | 14 min |
| #2 | misteryjunior | 349 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| #3 | Canermarf | 204 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #4 | smoll_fly | 173 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kujo | +4.29 | 77 | 52 |
| #2 | misteryjunior | -0.46 | 38 | 61 |
| #3 | soft_pudding | -0.49 | 56 | 47 |
| #4 | smoll_fly | -2.33 | 36 | 43 |
| #5 | Canermarf | -2.69 | 39 | 48 |





