








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 359 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 171 matches | ||
| Wingman | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2679 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,622 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1969 | 17% |
| Smokes | 3960 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2717 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2976 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,701,170 of utility $231 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1047 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smoll_fly | 55% | 189 |
| #2 | Kujo | 53% | 272 |
| #3 | soft_pudding | 52% | 264 |
| #4 | Canermarf | 50% | 239 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | smoll_fly | 55% | 189 |
| #2 | Kujo | 53% | 272 |
| #3 | soft_pudding | 52% | 264 |
| #4 | Canermarf | 50% | 239 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kujo | 15 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | soft_pudding | 14 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | smoll_fly | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Canermarf | 4 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kujo | 535 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #2 | Canermarf | 186 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #3 | smoll_fly | 177 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | soft_pudding | 126 | 0.02 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kujo | +4.50 | 76 | 52 |
| #2 | misteryjunior | -0.07 | 41 | 62 |
| #3 | soft_pudding | -0.46 | 54 | 47 |
| #4 | smoll_fly | -2.56 | 36 | 44 |
| #5 | Canermarf | -2.63 | 39 | 46 |





