








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 46 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 13 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
893 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,351 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1056 | 32% |
| Smokes | 946 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 684 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 665 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $201,626 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Temuzzi | 100% | 7 |
| #2 | luka | 71% | 7 |
| #3 | Ardee | 71% | 7 |
| #4 | 庫爾迪馬莫先生 | 67% | 9 |
| #5 | Rottab | 56% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Temuzzi | +7.16 | 91 | 66 |
| #2 | Ardee | +4.54 | 90 | 78 |
| #3 | luka | +4.36 | 85 | 39 |
| #4 | 庫爾迪馬莫先生 | +4.21 | 84 | 46 |
| #5 | kurwa bober | +1.95 | 84 | 62 |





