








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 211 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1249 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,886 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1159 | 40% |
| Smokes | 629 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 612 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 486 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $338,208 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c10ak3r | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | FoxSteak | 51% | 71 |
| #3 | DariYeen | 49% | 45 |
| #4 | Spooks | 38% | 21 |
| #5 | pathselector | 36% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | DariYeen | 49% | 45 |
| #4 | Spooks | 38% | 21 |
| #5 | pathselector | 36% | 11 |
| #6 | Stella | 32% | 25 |
| #7 | LarryNamel | 25% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DariYeen | 33 | 0.0443 |
| #2 | Stella | 13 | 0.0282 |
| #3 | FoxSteak | 8 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | pathselector | 8 | 0.0367 |
| #5 | c10ak3r | 6 | 0.0150 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DariYeen | 146 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #2 | Stella | 76 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #3 | FoxSteak | 44 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | pathselector | 43 | 0.20 | 0 min |
| #5 | Spooks | 17 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c10ak3r | +5.96 | 64 | 11 |
| #2 | DariYeen | +3.89 | 74 | 35 |
| #3 | pathselector | +3.17 | 75 | 19 |
| #4 | FoxSteak | +2.10 | 40 | 30 |
| #5 | Stella | +1.87 | 58 | 54 |





