








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 727 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 177 matches | ||
| Wingman | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 64 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3822 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,745 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2566 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2996 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 2257 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 1926 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,224,633 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 560 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zcamt | 69% | 32 |
| #2 | GOTMAXPOWER | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | Kastb3rgDK | 56% | 39 |
| #4 | N0BZEN | 55% | 76 |
| #5 | Hede | 49% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N0BZEN | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Hede | 3 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | Zcamt | 2 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | CYB0RK | 2 | 0.0045 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hede | 225 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | N0BZEN | 144 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Zcamt | 96 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | Kastb3rgDK | 80 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | GOTMAXPOWER | 53 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zcamt | +3.81 | 91 | 66 |
| #2 | W1Ccc☔ | +3.28 | 84 | 56 |
| #3 | Hede | +2.38 | 74 | 67 |
| #4 | Kastb3rgDK | +0.54 | 82 | 55 |
| #5 | GOTMAXPOWER | +0.49 | 63 | 68 |





