








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 220 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1067 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,217 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 416 | 19% |
| Smokes | 652 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 591 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 558 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $399,073 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | King. | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | lustig | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | StRoBoCoCk | 58% | 96 |
| #4 | Boris | 53% | 30 |
| #5 | Adde | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StRoBoCoCk | 13 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | lustig | 5 | 0.0292 |
| #3 | sparky | 4 | 0.0164 |
| #4 | Boris | 3 | 0.0049 |
| #5 | ph65bee | 2 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StRoBoCoCk | 105 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #2 | sparky | 53 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #3 | Boris | 40 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | King. | 32 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #5 | ph65bee | 27 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | karrigan | +1.95 | 67 | 46 |
| #2 | lustig | +1.79 | 79 | 42 |
| #3 | King. | +1.14 | 64 | 47 |
| #4 | StRoBoCoCk | +0.80 | 79 | 40 |
| #5 | sparky | +0.27 | 11 | 21 |





