










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1089 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,943 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 854 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1079 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 576 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 434 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $274,357 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 185 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | evm network | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | Catfishhh | 72% | 18 |
| #3 | Mullet Enjoyer | 64% | 22 |
| #4 | ixetray | 61% | 28 |
| #5 | erock | 52% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Catfishhh | 21 | 0.0665 |
| #2 | Mullet Enjoyer | 16 | 0.0407 |
| #3 | ixetray | 10 | 0.0185 |
| #4 | evm network | 6 | 0.0324 |
| #5 | erock | 3 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mullet Enjoyer | 89 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #2 | Catfishhh | 72 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #3 | ixetray | 46 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | evm network | 34 | 0.18 | 0 min |
| #5 | erock | 33 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mullet Enjoyer | +9.95 | 96 | 59 |
| #2 | Catfishhh | +8.72 | 92 | 65 |
| #3 | evm network | +1.21 | 85 | 29 |
| #4 | erock | +0.95 | 81 | 32 |
| #5 | 14000 cups of flour | -0.07 | 56 | 38 |





