








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 531 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 187 matches | ||
| Wingman | 153 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3875 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,646 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3805 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4083 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4122 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3636 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,183,631 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 240 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DanS | 61% | 28 |
| #2 | oj | 59% | 54 |
| #3 | ✪Kim Possible | 54% | 81 |
| #4 | naps | 52% | 105 |
| #5 | mr.von muhqdawqjuhqsr.wiseman | 51% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | naps | 52% | 105 |
| #5 | mr.von muhqdawqjuhqsr.wiseman | 51% | 134 |
| #6 | Jarno Rekiranta Neekeri | 51% | 71 |
| #7 | Veeti Karvainen | 50% | 60 |
| #8 | Rick Sanchèź | 42% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mr.von muhqdawqjuhqsr.wiseman | 24 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | Jarno Rekiranta Neekeri | 19 | 0.0141 |
| #3 | Veeti Karvainen | 17 | 0.0161 |
| #4 | naps | 14 | 0.0069 |
| #5 | Rick Sanchèź | 13 | 0.0204 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mr.von muhqdawqjuhqsr.wiseman | 286 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | oj | 230 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #3 | naps | 197 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | Jarno Rekiranta Neekeri | 181 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #5 | DanS | 133 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Veeti Karvainen | +4.68 | 89 | 54 |
| #2 | naps | +3.61 | 79 | 64 |
| #3 | Jarno Rekiranta Neekeri | +3.53 | 85 | 59 |
| #4 | mr.von muhqdawqjuhqsr.wiseman | +1.44 | 72 | 54 |
| #5 | DanS | +0.52 | 77 | 65 |





