








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 576 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 295 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




59 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4987 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,266 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2506 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3508 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 3130 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3122 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,630,095 of utility $174 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 672 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jarno Rekiranta Neekeri | 60% | 104 |
| #2 | mr.von muhqdawqjuhqsr.wiseman | 56% | 99 |
| #3 | oj | 54% | 130 |
| #4 | Beetle Juice | 52% | 105 |
| #5 | DanS | 49% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | oj | 54% | 130 |
| #4 | Beetle Juice | 52% | 105 |
| #5 | DanS | 49% | 49 |
| #6 | ✪Kim Possible | 48% | 60 |
| #7 | Rick Sanchèź | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oj | 24 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | Jarno Rekiranta Neekeri | 23 | 0.0115 |
| #3 | mr.von muhqdawqjuhqsr.wiseman | 12 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | Rick Sanchèź | 12 | 0.0160 |
| #5 | Beetle Juice | 7 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | oj | 610 | 0.24 | 17 min |
| #2 | Jarno Rekiranta Neekeri | 244 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| #3 | DanS | 233 | 0.25 | 6 min |
| #4 | Beetle Juice | 223 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | mr.von muhqdawqjuhqsr.wiseman | 213 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jarno Rekiranta Neekeri | +2.72 | 85 | 57 |
| #2 | naps | +2.02 | 76 | 56 |
| #3 | mr.von muhqdawqjuhqsr.wiseman | +1.40 | 72 | 58 |
| #4 | DanS | +1.30 | 78 | 67 |
| #5 | ✪Kim Possible | -0.79 | 81 | 52 |





