








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2705 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 440 matches | ||
| Premier | 340 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 62 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 87 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




54 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
14336 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 70,757 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 27430 | 39% |
| Smokes | 19409 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 9658 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 14260 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,104,558 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 6440 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Honk | 50% | 118 |
| #11 | Coach714 | 48% | 80 |
| #12 | patty | 47% | 70 |
| #13 | Kittycat456321 | 44% | 145 |
| #14 | Arisa メル | 44% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stormK | 34 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Coach714 | 12 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | LethalWMD | 10 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Honk | 6 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | patty | 6 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stormK | 3003 | 0.20 | 80 min |
| #2 | LethalWMD | 650 | 0.25 | 15 min |
| #3 | Yayo | 543 | 0.18 | 13 min |
| #4 | FoXTroZT | 333 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #5 | Gloomy | 299 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gloomy | +2.72 | 78 | 79 |
| #2 | Xpla1N =) | +2.29 | 85 | 50 |
| #3 | Yayo | +1.86 | 82 | 71 |
| #4 | werd | +1.64 | 82 | 74 |
| #5 | Vassoio | +0.80 | 67 | 56 |





