








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 442 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 155 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1293 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,316 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2762 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2043 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1765 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1746 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $724,561 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 372 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 5l-es demizson | 54% | 46 |
| #2 | 𝕯𝖆𝖓𝖎𝖊𝕷 | 50% | 112 |
| #3 | FizzyElf | 46% | 41 |
| #4 | MklsMersu | 42% | 130 |
| #5 | Youngmark | 42% | 151 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | FizzyElf | 46% | 41 |
| #4 | MklsMersu | 42% | 130 |
| #5 | Youngmark | 42% | 151 |
| #6 | P3P3 | 38% | 32 |
| #7 | brrszblcs | 37% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MklsMersu | 19 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Youngmark | 14 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | brrszblcs | 13 | 0.0127 |
| #4 | 𝕯𝖆𝖓𝖎𝖊𝕷 | 9 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | 5l-es demizson | 7 | 0.0073 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝕯𝖆𝖓𝖎𝖊𝕷 | 209 | 0.09 | 6 min |
| #2 | MklsMersu | 196 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | brrszblcs | 160 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | FizzyElf | 112 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #5 | P3P3 | 110 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 5l-es demizson | +5.69 | 55 | 48 |
| #2 | MklsMersu | +3.38 | 62 | 44 |
| #3 | brrszblcs | +1.72 | 47 | 57 |
| #4 | 𝕯𝖆𝖓𝖎𝖊𝕷 | +1.15 | 49 | 47 |
| #5 | P3P3 | -0.42 | 29 | 41 |





