








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 55 matches | ||
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1011 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,307 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 859 | 20% |
| Smokes | 651 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 1280 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1517 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $399,248 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stoner GabeN | 48% | 75 |
| #2 | Joeys World Tour | 45% | 100 |
| #3 | Chiseled Chin | 43% | 46 |
| #4 | Wook | 41% | 32 |
| #5 | TheCh3mist | 38% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Wook | 41% | 32 |
| #5 | TheCh3mist | 38% | 37 |
| #6 | Kizkey | 36% | 42 |
| #7 | Motortrends Truck Of the Year | 33% | 15 |
| #8 | KevinS | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chiseled Chin | 7 | 0.0086 |
| #2 | Joeys World Tour | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Stoner GabeN | 5 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Motortrends Truck Of the Year | 5 | 0.0189 |
| #5 | Kizkey | 2 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stoner GabeN | 276 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | Kizkey | 111 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | Joeys World Tour | 107 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | Chiseled Chin | 74 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | TheCh3mist | 72 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wook | +5.43 | 72 | 65 |
| #2 | Chiseled Chin | +4.62 | 64 | 49 |
| #3 | Joeys World Tour | +3.56 | 82 | 59 |
| #4 | Stoner GabeN | +1.04 | 79 | 70 |
| #5 | TheCh3mist | +0.07 | 49 | 49 |





