








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 624 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 310 matches | ||
| Faceit | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4707 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,321 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3382 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3456 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3981 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3502 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,257,676 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cookie | 79% | 24 |
| #2 | ? | 65% | 79 |
| #3 | 揽月 | 60% | 53 |
| #4 | ✪NewYorkJet✪▄︻┻═┳ | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | ❤️Megumi❤ | 56% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ikun | 6 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | 跟着水浪 | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | 寻常的高手 | 5 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | 我是不適要改一下名字 | 5 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | 2 | 3 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ikun | 658 | 0.21 | 14 min |
| #2 | 跟着水浪 | 523 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #3 | 寻常的高手 | 356 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #4 | ? | 263 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #5 | 巴巴托斯干点正事吧! | 202 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cookie | +3.49 | 69 | 61 |
| #2 | ✪NewYorkJet✪▄︻┻═┳ | +1.64 | 80 | 63 |
| #3 | 2 | +1.09 | 73 | 46 |
| #4 | ❤️Megumi❤ | +1.07 | 82 | 70 |
| #5 | ikun | +0.87 | 76 | 57 |





