








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 663 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 103 matches | ||
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Wingman | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2679 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,161 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3280 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2220 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1682 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1979 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $550,584 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1538 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StillSwing | 74% | 23 |
| #2 | Im Nub | 66% | 38 |
| #3 | Molbech | 66% | 35 |
| #4 | Rashida (رشيدة محمد م | 60% | 50 |
| #5 | numse.elsker #sussyBAKA | 60% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Rashida (رشيدة محمد م | 60% | 50 |
| #5 | numse.elsker #sussyBAKA | 60% | 95 |
| #6 | Hj0rt03- | 60% | 72 |
| #7 | wx | 58% | 19 |
| #8 | Lamme Lennart | 46% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | numse.elsker #sussyBAKA | 13 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Rashida (رشيدة محمد م | 6 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | Lamme Lennart | 6 | 0.0220 |
| #4 | Hj0rt03- | 5 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Im Nub | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | numse.elsker #sussyBAKA | 404 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #2 | Rashida (رشيدة محمد م | 174 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #3 | Im Nub | 125 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | Hj0rt03- | 101 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | Molbech | 90 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Twitch Bazeツ | +2.74 | 79 | 60 |
| #2 | StillSwing | +2.57 | 81 | 62 |
| #3 | Molbech | +2.25 | 84 | 59 |
| #4 | numse.elsker #sussyBAKA | +1.32 | 76 | 56 |
| #5 | Im Nub | +0.29 | 78 | 56 |





