








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 85 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Faceit | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2182 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,589 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1900 | 41% |
| Smokes | 1127 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 542 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 1020 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $998,602 of utility $264 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 55 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PapuTevas | 75% | 20 |
| #2 | juli | 63% | 32 |
| #3 | MullTastic | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | FjantSC | 58% | 55 |
| #5 | Wendy | 55% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | juli | 63% | 32 |
| #3 | MullTastic | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | FjantSC | 58% | 55 |
| #5 | Wendy | 55% | 121 |
| #6 | Seal | 54% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wendy | 7 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | FjantSC | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | juli | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | PapuTevas | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wendy | 256 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #2 | FjantSC | 83 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | PapuTevas | 71 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | juli | 25 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | Seal | 14 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wendy | +2.86 | 75 | 61 |
| #2 | Rvrky | +1.70 | 66 | 62 |
| #3 | FjantSC | +1.44 | 63 | 53 |
| #4 | PapuTevas | -0.22 | 40 | 77 |
| #5 | juli | -1.31 | 61 | 37 |





