








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 300 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 42 matches | ||
| Premier | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1787 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,591 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1558 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1717 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 1116 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1200 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $542,807 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 235 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #21 | Korbula | 30% | 10 |
| #22 | kyntäjä | 29% | 17 |
| #23 | ihanavietu | 25% | 16 |
| #24 | mule | 21% | 19 |
| #25 | fantsu | 9% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sakke | 142 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #2 | mark | 116 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #3 | cxrlos | 111 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #4 | vauhtisami | 108 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #5 | BenZamYSS | #EZ4ENCE | 69 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sammee | +4.45 | 96 | 62 |
| #2 | he1skaah | +3.96 | 87 | 72 |
| #3 | mark | +2.59 | 68 | 78 |
| #4 | Koskine | +2.57 | 63 | 45 |
| #5 | sakke | +1.70 | 76 | 63 |





