










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
399 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,164 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 337 | 29% |
| Smokes | 314 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 238 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 275 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $103,022 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 41 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Just1ce | 67% | 6 |
| #11 | kinz | 67% | 6 |
| #12 | Big daddy fish 672 | 56% | 16 |
| #13 | Net n Gawe Ou | 43% | 7 |
| #14 | Wall-E | 29% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Big daddy fish 672 | 5 | 0.0182 |
| #2 | Wall-E | 1 | 0.0066 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kinz | 48 | 0.42 | 1 min |
| #2 | Wall-E | 27 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #3 | Just1ce | 25 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #4 | Big daddy fish 672 | 22 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | Net n Gawe Ou | 17 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NadeZ | +3.12 | 91 | 57 |
| #2 | I'm not white, You're Black™ | +3.05 | 74 | 61 |
| #3 | Taboozle | +2.86 | 94 | 57 |
| #4 | Just1ce | +2.77 | 81 | 54 |
| #5 | Net n Gawe Ou | +2.65 | 76 | 67 |





