










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 393 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
889 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,783 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 640 | 23% |
| Smokes | 683 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 749 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 711 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $218,182 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 747 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaturOnurTR | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | bratool | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | Σ_Male | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | Wytse | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | TheDeagler42 | 58% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Σ_Male | 63% | 19 |
| #4 | Wytse | 60% | 5 |
| #5 | TheDeagler42 | 58% | 19 |
| #6 | napzter | 50% | 8 |
| #7 | koesh | 44% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheDeagler42 | 3 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | koesh | 2 | 0.0113 |
| #3 | napzter | 2 | 0.0116 |
| #4 | BaturOnurTR | 1 | 0.0092 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheDeagler42 | 27 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #2 | BaturOnurTR | 20 | 0.18 | 0 min |
| #3 | Σ_Male | 15 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | bratool | 14 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | koesh | 13 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | guapdad300 | +2.95 | 78 | 63 |
| #2 | bratool | +1.51 | 66 | 60 |
| #3 | Σ_Male | +1.41 | 59 | 41 |
| #4 | Wytse | +1.29 | 82 | 71 |
| #5 | napzter | -0.25 | 59 | 64 |





