








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 572 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 466 matches | ||
| Faceit | 34 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4858 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,032 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2878 | 24% |
| Smokes | 3942 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2480 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2732 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,994,344 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 98 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛Dezz♛ | 7 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | asdf | 6 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Alfimannen | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | furkS | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Step Bro | 3 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alfimannen | 217 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | asdf | 209 | 0.31 | 6 min |
| #3 | Step Bro | 108 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | briangutten | 100 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | ♛Dezz♛ | 100 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | asdf | +8.41 | 94 | 80 |
| #2 | ♛Dezz♛ | +5.22 | 89 | 53 |
| #3 | briangutten | +2.11 | 71 | 48 |
| #4 | Alfimannen | +0.85 | 68 | 60 |
| #5 | Step Bro | +0.19 | 80 | 58 |





