








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1035 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 133 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2555 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,070 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1615 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1300 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1764 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1391 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,009,600 of utility $213 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 151 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sebbilini | 77% | 35 |
| #2 | dpz | 77% | 13 |
| #3 | nygård | 70% | 23 |
| #4 | asdf | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | zxSkittlezxz | 57% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | asdf | 173 | 0.38 | 5 min |
| #2 | ✪ NICOMEISTER | 105 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | sebbilini | 75 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | zxSkittlezxz | 63 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | nygård | 55 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | asdf | +6.59 | 94 | 83 |
| #2 | briangutten | +3.89 | 74 | 51 |
| #3 | sebbilini | +2.65 | 72 | 57 |
| #4 | dsm | +1.63 | 81 | 58 |
| #5 | ✪ NICOMEISTER | +1.36 | 88 | 55 |





