








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 78 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 202 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2708 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,080 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2389 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3312 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1068 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 2311 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $638,249 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 454 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maximus | 67% | 21 |
| #2 | Nachtz | 53% | 83 |
| #3 | ToFu | 48% | 52 |
| #4 | ✪John sybau | 47% | 66 |
| #5 | haerin | 46% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Nachtz | 53% | 83 |
| #3 | ToFu | 48% | 52 |
| #4 | ✪John sybau | 47% | 66 |
| #5 | haerin | 46% | 89 |
| #6 | cannyS | 45% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | haerin | 10 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Nachtz | 7 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | cannyS | 5 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | ✪John sybau | 3 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cannyS | 387 | 0.27 | 11 min |
| #2 | Nachtz | 195 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | ✪John sybau | 153 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #4 | ToFu | 142 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #5 | haerin | 136 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | maximus | +2.33 | 77 | 50 |
| #2 | cannyS | +1.78 | 54 | 76 |
| #3 | Zzzzz ❤💙💛 | +0.78 | 56 | 51 |
| #4 | Nachtz | +0.67 | 72 | 63 |
| #5 | ToFu | +0.52 | 50 | 63 |





