








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 470 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 412 matches | ||
| Faceit | 46 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3892 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,025 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5212 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3669 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 5249 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 3895 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,780,741 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 407 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Lepa | 46% | 268 |
| #7 | Sipulirouhe | 44% | 52 |
| #8 | Sipilä | 44% | 266 |
| #9 | Pokkeli | 41% | 237 |
| #10 | jänö | 41% | 163 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Coffin | 27 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | Lepa | 23 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | Erec Shawn | 14 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | Sipilä | 11 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | jänö | 8 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lepa | 1424 | 0.25 | 42 min |
| #2 | Erec Shawn | 505 | 0.28 | 15 min |
| #3 | Bobo | 361 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #4 | Moneybags | 188 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #5 | jänö | 186 | 0.05 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Erec Shawn | +3.40 | 71 | 82 |
| #2 | Lepa | +3.32 | 71 | 83 |
| #3 | Sipilä | +1.10 | 71 | 35 |
| #4 | Bobo | +0.63 | 62 | 60 |
| #5 | zet | -0.54 | 58 | 64 |





