








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 41 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 61 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




29 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2119 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,075 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1721 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2082 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2413 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 859 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $556,254 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zurako | 47% | 181 |
| #2 | marijuana | 45% | 262 |
| #3 | Cursed_Destroyer | 38% | 37 |
| #4 | Darkness | 37% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zurako | 47% | 181 |
| #2 | marijuana | 45% | 262 |
| #3 | Cursed_Destroyer | 38% | 37 |
| #4 | Darkness | 37% | 83 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | marijuana | 11 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Zurako | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Darkness | 6 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | Cursed_Destroyer | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zurako | 97 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #2 | Darkness | 42 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #3 | marijuana | 41 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #4 | Cursed_Destroyer | 1 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zurako | +6.09 | 82 | 54 |
| #2 | Darkness | +5.14 | 80 | 51 |
| #3 | DRAGON BLOOD | +1.91 | 55 | 52 |
| #4 | marijuana | -6.04 | 6 | 10 |
| #5 | Cursed_Destroyer | -10.12 | 1 | 10 |





