








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 9 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
937 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,748 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 695 | 25% |
| Smokes | 663 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 628 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 762 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $149,624 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lux | 80% | 5 |
| #2 | t3zz | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | RTC | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | alex ♥ | 68% | 22 |
| #5 | Shos | 67% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #14 | -allancs | 50% | 32 |
| #15 | ✪ Avid | 43% | 30 |
| #16 | [B]ennyS | 43% | 21 |
| #17 | Aiendar | 39% | 33 |
| #18 | sss | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -allancs | 4 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | sss | 2 | 0.0101 |
| #3 | chance | 1 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | RTC | 1 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | Shos | 1 | 0.0081 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | -allancs | 139 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #2 | alex ♥ | 119 | 0.31 | 3 min |
| #3 | chance | 119 | 0.33 | 3 min |
| #4 | ✪ Avid | 112 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #5 | wyamauchi | 80 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lux | +4.04 | 79 | 65 |
| #2 | RTC | +3.09 | 70 | 74 |
| #3 | wyamauchi | +2.11 | 58 | 82 |
| #4 | alex ♥ | +2.00 | 47 | 81 |
| #5 | mewtwo | +1.85 | 79 | 59 |





