








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 224 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 321 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4276 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,671 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6438 | 30% |
| Smokes | 5690 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3843 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 5700 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,263,207 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 21 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fowl | 76% | 29 |
| #2 | Sev | 75% | 32 |
| #3 | [B]ennyS | 60% | 40 |
| #4 | Sickwhitit26 | 57% | 37 |
| #5 | -allancs | 55% | 33 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | ZigZee | 46% | 35 |
| #11 | Yuki | 43% | 30 |
| #12 | t3zz | 41% | 29 |
| #13 | *csR | 39% | 33 |
| #14 | Aiendar | 38% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sickwhitit26 | 4 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | -allancs | 4 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | chance | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | ZigZee | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | BROSEIDON | 2 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chance | 446 | 0.27 | 12 min |
| #2 | -allancs | 174 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #3 | Sev | 160 | 0.28 | 5 min |
| #4 | ZigZee | 153 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #5 | *csR | 151 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sev | +3.07 | 86 | 74 |
| #2 | t3zz | +2.71 | 87 | 60 |
| #3 | Bernard♛ | +2.67 | 80 | 68 |
| #4 | chance | +1.49 | 78 | 67 |
| #5 | fowl | +1.39 | 81 | 68 |





