








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 417 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 54 matches | ||
| Faceit | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2167 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,315 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1263 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1531 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1187 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1334 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $976,743 of utility $218 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 377 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FEL1X | 53% | 78 |
| #2 | HAASTIG Thano_1 | 51% | 85 |
| #3 | beennniiii | 47% | 57 |
| #4 | Pulviinus | 47% | 98 |
| #5 | HAASTIG basby | 47% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | beennniiii | 47% | 57 |
| #4 | Pulviinus | 47% | 98 |
| #5 | HAASTIG basby | 47% | 90 |
| #6 | Goratos | 44% | 55 |
| #7 | emmanuel kant | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HAASTIG basby | 12 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | HAASTIG Thano_1 | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | Pulviinus | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | emmanuel kant | 5 | 0.0200 |
| #5 | FEL1X | 4 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HAASTIG basby | 356 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #2 | Pulviinus | 191 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | FEL1X | 141 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Goratos | 95 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | beennniiii | 59 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | timnick25 | +1.04 | 54 | 50 |
| #2 | FEL1X | +0.97 | 59 | 68 |
| #3 | HAASTIG Thano_1 | +0.63 | 54 | 40 |
| #4 | Pulviinus | -0.28 | 41 | 66 |
| #5 | Goratos | -0.37 | 50 | 57 |





