








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 758 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 317 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 40 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6729 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,161 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7588 | 42% |
| Smokes | 4312 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1524 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 4737 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,806,079 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 707 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alexsx | 62% | 53 |
| #2 | CJ | 62% | 37 |
| #3 | Noir | 62% | 37 |
| #4 | Frizzi | 57% | 47 |
| #5 | El Wason BB | 56% | 68 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jei Jeico Jeicortes ENTERRAUW | 14 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Frizzi | 11 | 0.0121 |
| #3 | Alexsx | 4 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | insaniBeer | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Noir | 3 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | αndrewzxp | +2.68 | 76 | 81 |
| #2 | Yesid.peek | +2.25 | 73 | 65 |
| #3 | Noir | +1.26 | 83 | 66 |
| #4 | insaniBeer | +0.58 | 64 | 73 |
| #5 | CJ | +0.40 | 80 | 67 |





