








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 93 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
494 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,435 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 271 | 19% |
| Smokes | 347 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 346 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 471 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $342,824 of utility $245 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 56 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Joneski | 40% | 5 |
| #9 | Unikulma.fi 1LciMys | 40% | 10 |
| #10 | Napsu | 29% | 7 |
| #11 | johtotähti | 22% | 18 |
| #12 | v4lle | 22% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Napsu | 2 | 0.0148 |
| #2 | Bot Vaittify | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | v4lle | 1 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | KovaArska | 1 | 0.0031 |
| #5 | Unikulma.fi 1LciMys | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bot Vaittify | 155 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #2 | Unikulma.fi 1LciMys | 71 | 0.32 | 2 min |
| #3 | oMISTAJa | 53 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #4 | v4lle | 45 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | KovaArska | 38 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Napsu | +4.94 | 58 | 65 |
| #2 | Unikulma.fi 1LciMys | +4.39 | 49 | 54 |
| #3 | Joneski | +3.53 | 45 | 43 |
| #4 | Bot Vaittify | +2.41 | 69 | 75 |
| #5 | oMISTAJa | +2.23 | 55 | 80 |





