








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 910 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 577 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 49 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4816 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,539 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5878 | 27% |
| Smokes | 6179 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 4662 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4820 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,590,196 of utility $118 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 252 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anna Everdeen | 55% | 47 |
| #2 | EA17 | 51% | 81 |
| #3 | PUNISHER | 50% | 111 |
| #4 | Tong Hollank Peek | 48% | 58 |
| #5 | eds_ | 46% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | eds_ | 46% | 37 |
| #6 | duy | 45% | 73 |
| #7 | LS | 44% | 50 |
| #8 | iceballs | 44% | 101 |
| #9 | SHYinAction | 43% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LS | 8 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | iceballs | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | duy | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | Tong Hollank Peek | 3 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | eds_ | 3 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SHYinAction | 273 | 0.24 | 7 min |
| #2 | duy | 153 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | iceballs | 152 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | LS | 137 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Tong Hollank Peek | 95 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LS | +3.29 | 76 | 50 |
| #2 | PUNISHER | +2.86 | 77 | 12 |
| #3 | EA17 | +2.71 | 88 | 49 |
| #4 | duy | -0.16 | 75 | 58 |
| #5 | Jaspo | -0.37 | 46 | 57 |





