








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 210 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3505 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,278 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4558 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3868 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2200 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3652 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $656,265 of utility $96 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ronny beanbag | 5 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | lenny mountain | 4 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | fallenfalcopivotjabAKAfallenedit | 3 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | Mage | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | vueko! | 3 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ronny beanbag | 316 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #2 | lenny mountain | 143 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | Mage | 127 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #4 | fallenfalcopivotjabAKAfallenedit | 109 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #5 | Doc Holiday | 76 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✈johnny airplane✈ | +1.97 | 59 | 73 |
| #2 | Mage | +1.60 | 71 | 67 |
| #3 | ronny beanbag | +1.16 | 82 | 64 |
| #4 | vueko! | +1.13 | 53 | 35 |
| #5 | fallenfalcopivotjabAKAfallenedit | +0.77 | 65 | 63 |





