








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 497 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Faceit | 78 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1890 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,171 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2061 | 22% |
| Smokes | 2544 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2252 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2314 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $992,771 of utility $192 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 264 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | steppi | 64% | 47 |
| #2 | kevsu | 63% | 19 |
| #3 | Sista Bossen | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | edavid | 58% | 99 |
| #5 | MRK | 55% | 148 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | simppi | 49% | 61 |
| #11 | Johnhood | 48% | 87 |
| #12 | MaGGie | 46% | 13 |
| #13 | uwu | 40% | 30 |
| #14 | Belligol | 39% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | uwu | 7 | 0.0104 |
| #2 | edavid | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Knarkku | 4 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | kevsu | 3 | 0.0084 |
| #5 | Belligol | 3 | 0.0087 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | edavid | 492 | 0.23 | 14 min |
| #2 | MRK | 339 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #3 | Johnhood | 199 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #4 | Knarkku | 165 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | simppi | 159 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MRK | +3.11 | 85 | 67 |
| #2 | simppi | +1.79 | 86 | 61 |
| #3 | kevsu | +1.03 | 52 | 62 |
| #4 | edavid | +0.18 | 55 | 74 |
| #5 | Knarkku | -0.07 | 69 | 59 |





