








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 686 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 296 matches | ||
| Faceit | 284 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7574 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 26,222 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8277 | 32% |
| Smokes | 6532 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 7172 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 4241 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,466,199 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 838 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | charlemagne | 65% | 62 |
| #2 | Rabbit | 61% | 57 |
| #3 | PlodyRed | 59% | 86 |
| #4 | cock guzel | 58% | 64 |
| #5 | sLix マ | 51% | 162 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | cock guzel | 58% | 64 |
| #5 | sLix マ | 51% | 162 |
| #6 | np for sLix ॐ | 50% | 46 |
| #7 | 一次点击666 | 49% | 51 |
| #8 | Lil_Gr33dy | 48% | 138 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | charlemagne | 8 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Lil_Gr33dy | 7 | 0.0027 |
| #3 | Rabbit | 7 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | 一次点击666 | 7 | 0.0085 |
| #5 | sLix マ | 5 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rabbit | 287 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #2 | sLix マ | 272 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #3 | np for sLix ॐ | 204 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #4 | charlemagne | 199 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #5 | Lil_Gr33dy | 158 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | charlemagne | +5.31 | 93 | 76 |
| #2 | PlodyRed | +3.02 | 83 | 53 |
| #3 | Rabbit | +1.32 | 80 | 68 |
| #4 | Lil_Gr33dy | +0.61 | 74 | 48 |
| #5 | 一次点击666 | +0.23 | 74 | 47 |





