








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1394 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 473 matches | ||
| Faceit | 252 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8992 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,762 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4229 | 20% |
| Smokes | 5118 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5688 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 5727 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,893,395 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 851 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sys | 67% | 48 |
| #2 | charlemagne | 65% | 52 |
| #3 | wHo ✪ | 65% | 48 |
| #4 | PlodyRed | 63% | 95 |
| #5 | sLix マ | 60% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | charlemagne | +7.83 | 95 | 75 |
| #2 | wHo ✪ | +4.26 | 90 | 60 |
| #3 | PlodyRed | +3.79 | 85 | 52 |
| #4 | sLix マ | +1.25 | 70 | 54 |
| #5 | Lil_Gr33dy | +1.11 | 73 | 44 |





