








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 366 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1567 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,130 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1127 | 36% |
| Smokes | 700 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 807 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 496 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $443,474 of utility $109 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 244 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N-S | 54% | 24 |
| #2 | X | 48% | 159 |
| #3 | Hmmm | 48% | 153 |
| #4 | Kenta Kofot | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | Koiramies | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N-S | 54% | 24 |
| #2 | X | 48% | 159 |
| #3 | Hmmm | 48% | 153 |
| #4 | Kenta Kofot | 46% | 13 |
| #5 | Koiramies | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | X | 11 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Hmmm | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Kenta Kofot | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hmmm | 663 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| #2 | X | 241 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #3 | Koiramies | 57 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #4 | N-S | 48 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Kenta Kofot | 5 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | N-S | +2.72 | 71 | 49 |
| #2 | Hmmm | +2.14 | 68 | 59 |
| #3 | Koiramies | +1.78 | 73 | 64 |
| #4 | X | +0.37 | 52 | 52 |
| #5 | πLINGπ | -0.49 | 53 | 46 |





