








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 255 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
744 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,732 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 673 | 39% |
| Smokes | 310 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 410 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 339 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $391,021 of utility $218 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 124 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Warl0ck | 100% | 7 |
| #2 | WarDog | 100% | 9 |
| #3 | Alpi | 100% | 10 |
| #4 | schrievi | 83% | 6 |
| #5 | YKcivil | 78% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | N1TT ^^ ∫ | 52% | 33 |
| #9 | dengel | 50% | 48 |
| #10 | JustKoen | 46% | 13 |
| #11 | Zynex | 44% | 18 |
| #12 | ayez | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pug | 13 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | dengel | 12 | 0.0120 |
| #3 | N1TT ^^ ∫ | 8 | 0.0109 |
| #4 | Zynex | 7 | 0.0190 |
| #5 | JustKoen | 5 | 0.0181 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WarDog | +5.06 | 85 | 67 |
| #2 | Warl0ck | +4.55 | 70 | 73 |
| #3 | Alpi | +3.37 | 89 | 67 |
| #4 | YKcivil | +3.29 | 73 | 77 |
| #5 | schrievi | +2.99 | 83 | 72 |





