








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 271 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 72 matches | ||
| Faceit | 51 matches | ||
| Premier | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1231 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,874 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 698 | 24% |
| Smokes | 280 | 10% |
| HE Grenades | 1283 | 45% |
| Molotovs | 613 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $730,205 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 37 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lambda | 47% | 53 |
| #2 | beddyb | 46% | 13 |
| #3 | Nikzz | 44% | 25 |
| #4 | HeyImGary | 44% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lambda | 47% | 53 |
| #2 | beddyb | 46% | 13 |
| #3 | Nikzz | 44% | 25 |
| #4 | HeyImGary | 44% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nikzz | 3 | 0.0057 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lambda | 182 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #2 | HeyImGary | 95 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Nikzz | 86 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #4 | beddyb | 51 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lambda | +3.98 | 73 | 70 |
| #2 | Nikzz | -0.35 | 72 | 65 |
| #3 | ƬΣD | -0.59 | 48 | 39 |
| #4 | HeyImGary | -1.37 | 51 | 61 |
| #5 | beddyb | -3.51 | 23 | 59 |





