








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 407 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 157 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 120 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5607 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,719 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6475 | 22% |
| Smokes | 7310 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 7464 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 8470 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,485,771 of utility $187 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 885 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | UnOfficial | 50% | 194 |
| #8 | Dog Girl Chloe UwU | 49% | 210 |
| #9 | ℱurn | 44% | 237 |
| #10 | Relish | 43% | 121 |
| #11 | Rivers Homo | 39% | 186 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ℱurn | 30 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | Bublés | 23 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Dog Girl Chloe UwU | 21 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | Kitta | 18 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Relish | 18 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bublés | 1537 | 0.17 | 39 min |
| #2 | Dog Girl Chloe UwU | 549 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #3 | ℱurn | 431 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #4 | Freya 🏳️⚧ | 251 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Kitta | 244 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bublés | +6.99 | 83 | 71 |
| #2 | Freya 🏳️⚧ | +2.47 | 84 | 54 |
| #3 | Relish | +1.92 | 83 | 20 |
| #4 | MoistSeaCat | +1.51 | 80 | 66 |
| #5 | Dog Girl Chloe UwU | +1.24 | 48 | 49 |





