








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 263 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 87 matches | ||
| Faceit | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 45 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1964 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,159 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1579 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2452 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2573 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1555 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,045,718 of utility $211 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | killme '²³' | 70% | 23 |
| #2 | Obese' Dalfin '²³' | 63% | 38 |
| #3 | ✪ NightMarEZ | 60% | 15 |
| #4 | Rosa Percz | 57% | 28 |
| #5 | priple '²³' | 50% | 129 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | portugal police | 44% | 63 |
| #11 | Ryan "Citroen" Gosling | 44% | 25 |
| #12 | Onioon | 40% | 15 |
| #13 | LiblaTaskja | 39% | 18 |
| #14 | 5_K | 19% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | priple '²³' | 9 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | lillekerohus | 6 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | portugal police | 3 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Onioon | 3 | 0.0086 |
| #5 | ✪ NightMarEZ | 3 | 0.0094 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | priple '²³' | 536 | 0.20 | 15 min |
| #2 | lillekerohus | 309 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #3 | portugal police | 211 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #4 | Obese' Dalfin '²³' | 84 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #5 | 5_K | 69 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Obese' Dalfin '²³' | +3.39 | 59 | 75 |
| #2 | Gang Unit | +2.39 | 64 | 74 |
| #3 | priple '²³' | +1.78 | 55 | 71 |
| #4 | LiblaTaskja | +1.48 | 53 | 63 |
| #5 | ✪ NightMarEZ | +0.98 | 63 | 64 |





