








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 74 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 19 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
971 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,891 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 752 | 19% |
| Smokes | 918 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1241 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 980 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $505,149 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 57 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dank Magician | 89% | 9 |
| #2 | Malnoir | 62% | 45 |
| #3 | VacationGaminq | 56% | 27 |
| #4 | Keruby | 51% | 37 |
| #5 | SlayToby | 49% | 67 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | vodkabull0 | 267 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #2 | JsH | 262 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | Kevon | 160 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #4 | SlayToby | 154 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | Keruby | 88 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Malnoir | +6.28 | 84 | 43 |
| #2 | VacationGaminq | +1.92 | 72 | 51 |
| #3 | JsH | +1.64 | 74 | 65 |
| #4 | Kevon | +1.10 | 81 | 61 |
| #5 | Swarox | +0.34 | 49 | 41 |





