








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 788 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 313 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 74 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3979 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,885 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2522 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2093 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2385 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2885 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,457,070 of utility $182 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 540 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toronto | 51% | 295 |
| #2 | iber | 51% | 69 |
| #3 | OpTicOXx | 51% | 91 |
| #4 | dummy | 46% | 24 |
| #5 | MustyNuts | 45% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toronto | 51% | 295 |
| #2 | iber | 51% | 69 |
| #3 | OpTicOXx | 51% | 91 |
| #4 | dummy | 46% | 24 |
| #5 | MustyNuts | 45% | 128 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MustyNuts | 13 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Toronto | 11 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | OpTicOXx | 10 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | dummy | 2 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toronto | 591 | 0.09 | 12 min |
| #2 | OpTicOXx | 203 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | MustyNuts | 178 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #4 | dummy | 40 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | iber | 19 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zykros | +1.16 | 80 | 54 |
| #2 | iber | +0.34 | 82 | 24 |
| #3 | Toronto | +0.28 | 78 | 57 |
| #4 | dummy | +0.09 | 69 | 60 |
| #5 | OpTicOXx | -2.10 | 54 | 49 |





