








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 284 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 156 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6191 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,594 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3288 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1849 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1449 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 3008 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,560,391 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 547 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andy | 69% | 39 |
| #2 | BORN TO SHIT | 63% | 59 |
| #3 | ❟❛❟spencer👑 | 50% | 48 |
| #4 | 卂匚乇 | 48% | 185 |
| #5 | eGirl Ξίνα | 45% | 192 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andy | 69% | 39 |
| #2 | BORN TO SHIT | 63% | 59 |
| #3 | ❟❛❟spencer👑 | 50% | 48 |
| #4 | 卂匚乇 | 48% | 185 |
| #5 | eGirl Ξίνα | 45% | 192 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eGirl Ξίνα | 25 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | 卂匚乇 | 7 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | ❟❛❟spencer👑 | 4 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | Andy | 4 | 0.0050 |
| #5 | BORN TO SHIT | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eGirl Ξίνα | 481 | 0.13 | 13 min |
| #2 | 卂匚乇 | 271 | 0.08 | 7 min |
| #3 | Andy | 101 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #4 | BORN TO SHIT | 65 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | ❟❛❟spencer👑 | 64 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frodoMEISTER | +5.59 | 90 | 50 |
| #2 | Andy | +2.63 | 88 | 57 |
| #3 | ❟❛❟spencer👑 | -1.60 | 64 | 49 |
| #4 | 卂匚乇 | -1.77 | 58 | 50 |
| #5 | BORN TO SHIT | -2.15 | 39 | 34 |





