








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 104 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1262 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,109 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1270 | 31% |
| Smokes | 959 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 887 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 993 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $340,992 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VraM | 90% | 10 |
| #2 | Smoosh | 82% | 11 |
| #3 | EFFiciencY | 75% | 12 |
| #4 | xFloXii | 67% | 6 |
| #5 | SeSpastian | 67% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | t0ad | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kms | +1.94 | 92 | 39 |
| #2 | Smoosh | +1.63 | 85 | 69 |
| #3 | EFFiciencY | +1.27 | 83 | 61 |
| #4 | SeSpastian | +1.11 | 81 | 75 |
| #5 | ultradu(mm) | +0.87 | 87 | 63 |





