








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 93 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1031 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,643 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 704 | 27% |
| Smokes | 451 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 899 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 589 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $336,698 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Prheal | 59% | 44 |
| #5 | JSkey | 57% | 7 |
| #6 | Maximztw | 53% | 17 |
| #7 | [3DfX] VooDoo | 50% | 18 |
| #8 | S4rOu | 50% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S4rOu | 94 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | Prheal | 52 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | Maximztw | 36 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | [3DfX] VooDoo | 22 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | tezy | 22 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tezy | +5.72 | 84 | 60 |
| #2 | Maximztw | +3.84 | 78 | 72 |
| #3 | Virtual_Omega | +1.95 | 94 | 61 |
| #4 | JSkey | +1.23 | 79 | 53 |
| #5 | [AAEEG] LastFlam | +1.19 | 75 | 55 |





