








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 87 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2075 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,782 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2935 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3327 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2701 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 819 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $738,417 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 108 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | venom666 | 62% | 60 |
| #2 | teck-on1 | stoff | 51% | 95 |
| #3 | DON'T TRUST ME IM NOOB | 48% | 23 |
| #4 | glesay | 42% | 48 |
| #5 | Pokkeli | 37% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | teck-on1 | stoff | 51% | 95 |
| #3 | DON'T TRUST ME IM NOOB | 48% | 23 |
| #4 | glesay | 42% | 48 |
| #5 | Pokkeli | 37% | 19 |
| #6 | Maroc | 32% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | venom666 | 17 | 0.0144 |
| #2 | glesay | 5 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | Maroc | 4 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | teck-on1 | stoff | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | DON'T TRUST ME IM NOOB | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | teck-on1 | stoff | 107 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #2 | glesay | 50 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | venom666 | 33 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | DON'T TRUST ME IM NOOB | 33 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Maroc | 28 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | venom666 | +5.26 | 85 | 29 |
| #2 | DON'T TRUST ME IM NOOB | +3.35 | 52 | 45 |
| #3 | teck-on1 | stoff | +0.03 | 35 | 56 |
| #4 | Pokkeli | -0.04 | 66 | 18 |
| #5 | glesay | -0.82 | 31 | 42 |





