








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 548 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 716 matches | ||
| Wingman | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7867 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,894 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4312 | 15% |
| Smokes | 8768 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 8000 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 6814 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,910,063 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 744 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | benji | 61% | 80 |
| #2 | LA Zoo | Icy Penguin | 54% | 71 |
| #3 | Amadeus | 53% | 94 |
| #4 | Tarantino | 51% | 295 |
| #5 | Rico2Suave | 51% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | bupks | 49% | 207 |
| #8 | traepa | 46% | 115 |
| #9 | 2d gamba | 46% | 523 |
| #10 | Kenez | 46% | 126 |
| #11 | KABOOSE | 44% | 103 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2d gamba | 47 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | bupks | 24 | 0.0052 |
| #3 | traepa | 19 | 0.0079 |
| #4 | Tarantino | 18 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Kenez | 11 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2d gamba | 1386 | 0.12 | 34 min |
| #2 | bupks | 559 | 0.12 | 15 min |
| #3 | KABOOSE | 465 | 0.21 | 10 min |
| #4 | Kenez | 397 | 0.15 | 12 min |
| #5 | Tarantino | 336 | 0.06 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | rabb1t | +2.23 | 73 | 71 |
| #2 | Kenez | +2.18 | 74 | 79 |
| #3 | Amadeus | +1.38 | 60 | 51 |
| #4 | traepa | +1.28 | 89 | 47 |
| #5 | benji | +0.70 | 77 | 62 |





