








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 749 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 239 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 76 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




90 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5534 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,922 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3956 | 33% |
| Smokes | 2246 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 3110 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2610 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,846,913 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 537 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #13 | Rambro | 39% | 111 |
| #14 | Sarmishra | 38% | 89 |
| #15 | Warcry | 34% | 32 |
| #16 | I Can't Carry | 30% | 33 |
| #17 | Ligma | 30% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kimi ka londa | 10 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | InderDace | 8 | 0.0055 |
| #3 | mikejbe9 | 6 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | !Flawless | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | Rambro | 6 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kimi ka londa | 376 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #2 | modiiBUYDOGGO | 257 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #3 | TYSON_32 | 158 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #4 | GC | 143 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #5 | sne3Zy | 141 | 0.17 | 3 min |





